forever

Why I Can’t Promise Forever

Lately, I have been thinking about the word forever. Forever is a widely used word to emphasize someone’s love or hatred towards a something or someone. I’m not saying ban the word.  I do question why the word is used as often as it is.  I don’t think it’s a word that can honestly be promised to anyone.  We change too often for that to happen. 

I can’t promise forever because forever can’t be promised to anyone. No one knows what tomorrow will bring, or even what 10 minutes from now could bring. I could land a major movie role tomorrow and go to New Zealand for three years. A brick could fall on my head after I leave my house later today, leaving me in a coma. I don’t know what the future holds.  So to promise forever would be breaking a promise the minute the words leave my lips. What I can promise is that I will love and care for the people who make an effort to love me back.

I can promise to listen to you and to answer the phone at 3 am if you’re in trouble. I can promise to be a role model to those younger than me, though I will make mistakes. I can promise to hold the door open for a stranger and to apologize for my wrongdoings. I will forgive people, and I will call you on your birthday, even if I’m mad.  I’ll send you your favorite chocolate when times are hard.  I will try to find a way to make you feel loved. 

What I can’t promise is that I will always be around. That I will always be a rock to those who look up to me.  That I will always be a friend. Because things happen, and while I would love to promise forever, I would never willingly break your heart. I will fail, and I will push you away. It’s who I am, I crave growth and sometimes growing means leaving. I will pass judgment, we all do it. I will move away and forget to call on days that my own world consumes me. I can’t promise that I will always like you, but I can promise that I’ll never hate you. (life’s too short for that)

I would never promise forever because I would never want you to hold on to someone who’s no longer around to hold you the way you deserve.

The only person you can promise forever to is yourself. Because the only one who will always be in your life, is you. So I will promise to take care of myself, so I can live as long as God has planned for me to live. I will make time to ensure that I’m emotionally healthy, so I can be emotionally available to for those who need me.  I will leave abusive situations because my personal growth is more important than negativity. I will reach milestones when I’m ready. I will work to positively influence those around me, while I’m here.  

Once I move away (or die), the only thing that matters is how I’ve touched the lives of those who knew me.  

I will make promises when I feel that I can keep them, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to promise forever.

Photo by Renee Fisher on Unsplash

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